“A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.”
Proverbs 18:19 KJV
People show you their character all the time, the question is are we paying attention. The Word says: “My son, attend unto my wisdom, and bow thine ear to my understanding: That thou mayest regard discretion, and that thy lips may keep knowledge.”
Proverbs 5:1-2 KJV
In other words don’t try to do it yourself, even if you have been doing IT for a long time, just know God has a better way. The Word says, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5 .
Sometimes people can be doing their best and it still rub everyone the wrong way, but I don’t expect a mechanic to be great at laying asphalt. Just stick to what you are good at, that’s not to say don’t try something new. I had to help remodel an office which took about 18 months and the more we did ourselves saved us that much more money. The more you learn the better things will be, even if it’s knowing enough about it to know that you don’t want to have anything to do with it. It’s just always good to know, but when you are great at something consider taking the time to pour the knowledge into someone else. It may take a while but at least you have passed the knowledge along. Doing it this way they’re able to have their own vision from God with it and maybe do some things that will end up being a blessing to you.
The way we teach goes a long way, there are a few trades that I have learned here in the past few years and I can truly say I had a great teacher. Now all teachers are not spirit filled and for the ones that are not the word gives us clear instruction on how to conduct ourselves. “Let as many servants as are under the yoke count their own masters worthy of all honour, that the name of God and his doctrine be not blasphemed. And they that have believing masters, let them not despise them, because they are brethren; but rather do them service, because they are faithful and beloved, partakers of the benefit. These things teach and exhort.”
1 Timothy 6:1-2
God’s fruit of His Spirit is LOVE so we should always lead with such. Trust me it can be hard sometimes, but God will get the glory and they will notice your patience and long suffering as well as give it back. When God is glorified those labors of love are not in vain. I thank God for the believing teachers that I have had because they actually checked to see if I would be at prayer and church. Those were definitely things my other employer definitely didn’t do.
When you are offended it’s like you are not all there, like you are turned off in a sense. That person or spouse begins to remember every little thing you may have done in the past and now holds all those things against you. The Bible says that it’s actually easier to win a city than this person, so aim to tame your tongue. Don’t just speak in haste out of frustration. Train yourself to purposely be silent when you are frustrated (easier said than done), but the more you recognize this the better you will become. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.”
Proverbs 18:21 KJV
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ESV
As blood bought believers we strive for perfection. Strive means to devote serious effort or energy. With all our hearts, minds, strength and soul we must understand we are not above correcting and we desperately need to be constantly moving more and more out of our lives so that we have more and more room for God! There is nothing glamourous about a cross or carrying one. THIS is what we are supposed to be doing as Christ followers, but more and more we hear about what God owes us; getting our increase is such a slap in the face and is not biblical. The Word says that we must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God. When we think of Job there was way more chapters on his pain and sufferings than the blessing, and understand I'm not harping on embracing your struggles or poverty. By all means strive to be the best at what God has gifted you in, but always be Spirit led. Pray first and last, first before if God gives you vision on a thing and begins to speak concerning that thing continue to pray all the way through so its so much of His will being done that you can't take any credit for anything. What does the Word say?